Hurt People Tend To Hurt Others

Maybe they hurt you more than once, but have you ever thought about why they did this? We rarely think about what might have happened to another person to react that way. However, this is normal behavior for injured  people. 

At times they are just trying to protect themselves in this very wrong way. Without realizing it, they hurt others  because they themselves are in pain.

Hurt people have suffered a lot

Today we’ll show you a few examples to help you understand why hurt people behave this way.

Imagine that a child has been abused and has also seen what happened to one of its parents. Without realizing it, the child gets the idea that that behavior is normal and starts to reproduce it. 

Although these children cry and feel pain, later in life they may mistreat their partner or use violence against anyone who hurts them. After all, it is a behavior pattern that they have experienced since childhood.

If this type of aggression only occurs during adulthood, the person may try to act in the same way to avoid being victimized again. Inside they think, “Better than me again.”

The same goes for those who have not experienced affection. When they are in a relationship, they cling to the other person and struggle with a terrible emotional dependency.

How does it create wounds?

Beware! This is a subtle form of abuse that you should not allow in your life.

Jealousy, the urge to control your partner so that he/she doesn’t leave you, feelings of guilt, making someone else responsible for your own happiness…  Ultimately, the other person becomes exhausted by the toxic relationship.

What should you do to help hurt people?

You can’t really try to change a hurt person. Sometimes they know they can’t go on like this and they are aware of what they are doing wrong. However, it is their decision and not something that others can make them realize. Usually their behavior is not pre-planned.

So what can you do for these people to keep them from hurting you?

Here are some options:

• Do not go further than necessary. Sometimes they may try to manipulate you. Others will try to make you discover their past and make you feel sorry for them. However, you are also important and you have to take care of yourself.
• You can talk to them about it if you want. But don’t do it more than necessary. When you’ve reached your limits, learn to walk away.

• Make sure you don’t start acting like them. They’re hurt, and if you start acting like them, you’ll make sure they continue to act like them. You may even harm their self-image.
• Turn around  if you notice they hurt you.
• Don’t tell them what to do. No one can help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. If you want to avoid getting exhausted or keep trying in vain, tell them to seek professional help. Try not to influence them further.

Accept hurt people

It is best to accept hurt people as they are. Everyone has been hurt and we may have hurt others too, without intending to.

Your instinct for survival doesn’t always do this in the most appropriate way. It has no values, no rules. It just wants you to survive and overcome what happened to you. So don’t look down on the kid who hurts another kid in school. Maybe it has no self confidence or a lot of problems at home.

The best thing you can do is stop the behavior and try to correct it in time, before it gets more difficult as they mature.

Once you are an adult, you can open your eyes, recognize what is happening and ask for help to change and stop hurting others.